139. Help Wanted: Robot

I can hardly wait till it’s 40 years from now. I’m especially looking forward to these:

1.  Driverless cars.  I’m definitely going to get one. Thanks to computer and GPS technology, we’ll just keyboard where we want to go.  Then, instead of regular seats, there’ll be a sofa where we can sit back, put our feet up and read books about the old days when there used to be car accidents due to not having driverless cars.

2. Being thin.  Limitless battery power will be derived from such sources as bacteria, wind, sun, ocean power, and energy from calories diverted from lots of people eating Macademia Nut Clusters. All fat people have a lot to look forward to. Not only will overeating be accepted, it will be necessary in order to keep the household appliances running. And by contributing one’s excess energy, one will become thin.  Thin will be in.  WeightWatchers will be out.

3. CABF:  Computer Aided Brain Function will become widely implemented, with Octo-woman as its first candidate.  I’m planning on renovating my brain with, say, 4 GHz and a 2 GB hard drive for starters.  I may augment that later on.  My objective will be total memory recall, with an archiving feature to allow bad memories to be excluded from the mainstream but retained offline. I’ll want to remember everything I’ve ever read, also. Intellectually, I’m hoping for computer-aided decision-making based on instantly accessible data from the world-wide web.  I’ll learn flawless card-counting and odds-prediction. I think I’ll be spending a lot of time at the gaming tables and the racetrack. I can hardly wait.

4.  Our households will be kept immaculate and orderly by economical but friendly household robots. Their primitive forerunners – like the Roomba and the Scooba to vacuum and scrub floors – will become antiques kept for amusement and nostalgia. Star Wars varieties like R2D2 and C3PO are already over the hill. The household robots of tomorrow will be much smarter and better looking too, so as not to scare the kiddies. I think I’ll get one that looks like Nanny McPhee or Mary Poppins although the one below may have to do for now.

Her name is Aiko.  She’s a female robot and is made from silicone.  She’s Japanese and (supposedly) looks, feels and acts like humans. She can speak two languages, she’s a master mathematician and has 13,000 sentences in her vocabulary. Moreover, she also reacts when shown affection or hurt. Apparently, she does windows. She’s not available at amazon.com yet.

Yup, yup.  I can hardly wait. In the meantime, we can only continue our manual labor as we wait patiently await our future progress in automation.

Friend Linda Lewis sent me this little video this week.  In case you’ve had a burning desire to avoid having to open the window drapes in the morning all by yourself, this is for you. You may not be terribly impressed with the method, but, hey, it’s a start.


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One Response to 139. Help Wanted: Robot

  1. Linda Lewis says:

    Pat, you are probably going to get a few more hits. This went on my fb. And Costco probably will sell more mac clusters, too. :o) I can hardly wait to start the editing tomorrow so I can get a mac cluster!

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